Hora de Recreo (Playtime)

Balls in a muffin tin and rubber bands on a
bread pan...endless exploration.

Tugging box, a mom special.

Sticky noodles...not her
(or my) favorite.

 Lucy gets bored with her stuff more quickly than I ever would have expected. To try to save our bank account and keep life interesting we take lots of field trips to new spaces, even if it is just a park to watch older kids play. Lucy has become particularly popular at our neighborhood park when we pull out a blanket and cover it in toys. Little ones who want to participate in playground play think a blanket with small goodies is the cat's meow. We are happy to share for a few reasons: Lucy likes meeting new people, it is good for her to interact with other small humans and I, selfishly, use this tactic to meet other parents in a non-awkward, more natural way.

Water play outside in the shared green space.

Pinterest is still one of my favorite ways to waste precious baby is sleeping time and I get a real kick out of making things for her. We also do simple, but varied activities like filling a tub with warm water in the back courtyard and exploring cooked noodles on a shower curtain outside. Jim is finally starting to enjoy spending time playing with her and the more creative we get the more fun everyone has.

Eight Months of Awesome

Lucy started "saying" mama this morning. Many times. On video and for her Daga at lunch (proof and a witness). I am not sure if she is relating this to me or not, but a little tear trickled down my face when I was sure that mama was coming out of her little mouth in the sweetest, softest most beautiful voice I have ever heard. Be still my little heart.

At 8 months old she is learning and doing a gillion new things. Of course this is obvious to us, as we assume everything she accomplishes is super advanced. Most recently we have noticed that she is holding an object in both hands now. She seems pretty excited that there are two different items for eating at the same time. As soon as she started crawling she woke up and decided she is ready to stand, which makes one out of three members of our family ready for this step. She is pushing up on our legs, on chairs, on blocks, on boxes..anything she can get her hands on. We are attempting to teach her to slide backwards off of furniture and our bed so that she can land on her feet and she gets a pretty big kick out of her feet hitting the floor. Oh, the little things in life :-). No teeth yet and a happy nursing mama for the late arrival of impending boobie slicers. She is crushing solid foods and the list of foods she has tried/liked is so long that even her teachers are impressed with her. Like I said, advanced baby. 

Speaking of her teachers, Little Miss starts "school" on Monday. She has her own little cubby, diaper cabinet and space in the pantry. We have been doing short visits together this week (after I begged and pleaded and weaseled my way in the room). Her teachers seem lovely thus far and happy to have attempt a smooth transition. Lucy seems content there and looks to me for reassurance often while we visit with her new classmates. She adapts to new environments fairly quickly so I have no doubt that she will do well at school, too. I just wish she didn't have be there for so many hours a day. I am feeling good, not good, terrible, wait...really great...and not so great about starting my program all at the same time. She definitely needs more than just me in her day, but I would also shove her back in my uterus and take her to class with me if I could stand to miss out on her smile and her little "mamas."  Since I can't, I am going to frequent her classroom and provide as many opportunities for nursies as possible. I am sure she won't mind and her teachers encourage it.  So far I don't have class on Mondays or Fridays, so I am hoping to keep those days short for her and get a ton of work accomplished while she is at the childcare center. Then when I pick her up we can just play, play, nurse, eat, play, nurse and nurse. 

Jim doesn't say many sweet things. I mean, he is darling and I love him so deeply I can hardly stand it sometimes, but I didn't marry him because he is Mr. Romantic. He did say to me this week when I was having one of MANY moments of doubt that me going back to school for a PhD is a game changer for Lucy. She will get to have a mommy who has her own thing going on in addition to being enthralled with her daughter and that it is so important for her to have me as her role model in that way. He also sees the value in being a full-time mom, but this is the path we have chosen as a family and I do believe it will beneficial to all of us. If it is not, we will regroup, reassess and make new decisions. 

Wriggle, Slither, Rock and Crawl!

Last night LuBear had a difficult falling asleep. I mentioned to Jim that it seemed like she just couldn't calm her body down. She was rolling over onto her belly and pushing her feet on my legs whilst nursing in bed. She ended up being up until 10:15 and then up again at 11:00.

Sure enough, she woke up on the early side this morning and we sat down to play then, crawling! She just pushed up and went for it. Hard work pays off!

A Change of Pace

Climbing has definitely been more challenging with a Lucy than without a Lucy. It will be easier when establish a climbing crew here, but it is possible with just the two of us. I strap her on my chest and now she is big enough to ride in the backpack, and we set a belay that is independent of the belayer in case the belayer (usually me) needs to escape the belay. We try to find places with moderate approaches, single pitch and lead or top rope. I mostly belay based on Lucy's need/desire to nurse and sleep on me, but if I get one climb in I am a happy mama. It is a thrill just to get out there and explore all of our new territory, so I try to take things as they are and accept whatever Lucy brings along for the day. Luckily she is champion nurser and we don't have to deal with bottles out in the woods. If we are fortunate enough to have a third belayer in our group, Jim and I act as one climber and the third person gets to climb as much as if he/she was in a group of two. We just met some fellow parent-climbers yesterday at the gym. It sounds like we are going to be able to connect with them and see if we can get some ropes up outside.


Hiking is easy peasy. Pack the kid up, bring your boobs, strap a light weight yoga mat to your day pack to make nursing and leg stretching more comfy for everyone and you are on your way. We did a 7 miler in Flagstaff. Lucy was done being strapped to my chest we when were done. I was wishing we had an ergo 360 or another carrier that had more options. It would be even better with her in the back backpack now.

We are loving biking. We got a Burley Bee on craigslist, found the infant seat for it at an REI garage sale (we live in walking distance to REI. THey are currently receiving a lot of our funds :-), and my at one time super awesome, expensive mountain bike now has a mom seat, a rear view mirror and a kickstand.  Lucy almost always falls asleep and if she isn't sleeping she is chatting away, chewing on something and looking around. I worry a bit about all the bumpiness to her growing brain, but we have specific streets called bicycle boulevards that are nicely paved and have barriers every so often to discourage cars from taking them, so we feel pretty safe.

Basically, it all changed for us, but haven't given anything up. We are climbing at the gym twice a week while Lucy spends an hour in the childcare center there. I only climb for that hour, but then we come home for a bath and Jim stays until his heart's content. Is that perfect? No...but it sure as hell is better than waiting until she is a teenager to be healthy, have fun and connect with my husband. It can't be the same as it used to be and I don't want it to be. That would mean no Lucy and she is remarkable. I definitely have moments, mostly around the 3am mark, that I wish we could pack up and head back to Thailand, but that will come in time. And we get to share those times with her now, which makes missing out on some fun now completely worth it.

I will say this. I have been biking, up hill 3.5 miles, to the YMCA with Lucy at least two-three days a week for the past couple of weeks. I have been focusing on regaining strength so lots of squats, wall sits, planks and pull-ups, etc...I only workout for half an hour, but it is so refreshing and rebuilding. I no longer have guilt at putting her child watch for a short time. She has fun with the other kids and grown-ups in there anyway. My back hurts less, my baby dispenser is feeling stronger and more "normal" and I have so much more energy for Lucy. It took a while to get in a routine, but it has been the smartest thing I could do for everyone in our family. I sometimes even get to shower when we get home. And, today, I dried my hair for the fourth day in a row. Watch out. We are about to take over the world. Well, at least take back over my own body :-).

To Sleep or Not To Sleep...That is Lucy's Question

 Sleep. I used to sleep up to 12 straight hours a night. I would sleep that long and then nap in the afternoon if I could. I love sleep as much as I love ice cream. And along came baby...

Sleep deprivation is a crazy thing. And I literally mean crazy, as in, my head does not function properly because I am tired crazy. Lucy has been a "good" sleeper since the moment she was born. She definitely likes to be in motion when she sleeps, but she has really had very little day/night confusion. The latest I can ever remember being up with her as a newborn was 1:15 in the morning and she stayed in bed until 11:00 the next day. 

She is still this way. She stays in the bed for 11-12 hours every night. If she goes to bed a bit later than usual she sleeps in a little later. Sounds heavenly, right? It is a gift not to be up for long stretches in the middle of the night, but when you are crazy in the head you can warp your thoughts into insane, unappreciative thinking fast. 

Right before we left on our cross-country Luey Baby was up to a 3-4 hour stretch followed by nursies followed by a 4-5 hour stretch. She maintained a reasonable schedule for a small human who was being schleped all over creation and sleeping somewhere new every/every other night. But then the havoc set in and so did the crazy space in my brain. Lucy started waking up 8-9 times a night, almost every hour and demanded to nurse every time. I started to get snappy with Jim and frustrated with her. I also started reading about sleep and filling that crazy space in my head with opposing ideas from every direction. 

Then I read the only helpful thing I have ever read about baby sleep. You can't force a baby to sleep, but you can force yourself to change your attitude about baby sleep. Something reasonable floated into that crazy space in my mind and calmed the waters. I realized I needed to be thankful for the 11-12 hours she (and I, if I was smart enough to go to bed with her) spent in the bed. I also started tuning back in to my mom instincts and made a few changes. 

• Queen mattress on floor: we put our bed on the floor with a toddler next to it. This gave me peace of mind for babe staying in the bed and gave all three of us some room to move. When I was getting sleep, it was unworried, good sleep (just not enough of it ;-)
• Removal of sleep sack: 2 less wakings the following nights 
• Kicked dad out of the bed and into the guest room: self-soothing every other hour occured when I wasn't worried about disturbing Jim's sleep
• Sleep-log: really irritating in the middle of the night, but has helped my sanity as I can see real change, triggers for bad sleep and changes that encouraged better sleep. 
• Sound maker: turned off the music and turned on ocean waves kept her sleeping through the end of her first sleep cycle (something that has never happened prior to now at any time for night sleep)
• Nursies: only every two hours or more and she is self soothing back to sleep in between without even asking for milk
• Refusing to leave the bed once we are in it: first night=1 hour of crying with me laying beside her while she wallowed around (nursies whenever she asked) feeling so exhausted that I considered morphing into a zombie, second night= 45 minutes of crying with same available of comfort from me, third night 30 minutes of nursies, wallowing and sleepy talk but minimal crying, tonight (number 4)=25 minutes of nursies and snuggles with NO crying and then drifted peacefully off to sleep (after launching her lovey across the bed about 48 times...she just want get attached to that snuggly little guy).

She has only woken up every 1.5-3 hours for the past few nights, which may seem painful, but it is forward progress and for that I am thankful. I am also committed to keeping perspective from here on out. I was really starting to freak out when I was so tired I couldn't get shoe on each foot, let alone start a PhD program. As we always sing to her, "Every little thing is gonna be alright." LuBear also seems to be shifting from three short naps to two longer naps a day, all on her own. Yesterday she took a 2 hour and 40 minute nap. Luckily I was smart enough to nap with her and then I had time to eat lunch, write a blog post and do some prep for school. 

The Sitting-Up, Rolling Over, and Sitting BACK Up Girl

Lulubee amazes us more every moment of every day. She may still wake up 5-8 times during the night, but she is one adventurous, out-going and confident kid during the day. She has finally mastered sitting back up on her own and she is as proud as a peacock. Lately she has taken a liking to clapping and she gets a big ovation for this success. It was so frustrating for her when she felt stuck on her belly. Now she has it all under control.

What we do when the power goes out. 

New "baby" seat for the Burley Bee!

Which led to an interesting turn in events. Lucy doesn't seem to be as interested in forward movement any more. She can scale the body pillow and slide out of the bed and can army crawl across the room to get to something fascinating (ie: a shoe), but she is so darn happy just leaning for things near her and sitting back up that she hasn't been doing much moving for the past few days. She does have a new found interest in pulling herself up and standing, such as the side of the tub and her toy box. It is fun to watch all of her physical developments evolve.

Finally big enough to ride in the back carrier.

We often walk over to the playground in our neighborhood with a blanket and a bag of toys she hasn't seen in a while. She is now "asking" to see what is in the bag and making her own choice of what to pull out and play with. Her movements are getting much more refined and she can move one thing out of her way to get to another item that she is after. There is less throwing her arm around to eject a toy and more intention in putting it down. Her fine motor skills have made significant changes and she turns pages in books with both her hands and her feet. Lulu is working at using her fingers and thumbs to move the little beads on her wire maze toys, previously just slap at them to make the beads spin around. All of a sudden (as so many things that happen with a baby), she picked up on "sharing." Now we get to take a bite of whatever she is gnawing on while she giggles, takes a bite herself and shoves it back in our mouth. This provides great distraction in line at the grocery store!

Strawberries are tart!

Food has become lots of fun and I am really enjoying preparing food for her. Her list of foods is so long now (with regular poos, yay!) that we will probably up her intake of solids to two meals a day soon. So far she only dislikes bananas and had one very bad reaction to egg yolk, so we will try those again in another month. She is recognizing whole food now and even took her first ride in the cart when we were grocery shopping. She loves to touch all of the different produce and gets a bit annoyed when she can't have all of it at the very moment. Her and gadaga (daddy) love sharing apples and she seems to have accepted the fact that he is going to eat sour granny smith apples and not sweet honeycrisps like mommy :-).

First artwork...finger painting in a ziplock bag.

While my anxiety about being a wife, mom and a student grows, Lucy continues to show us that she wants to experience more and more of the world. Taking her to activities and events has shown us how interested she is in getting to everyone around her. She smiles at and reaches out to touch almost everyone she meets, melting hearts every where we go. I am hopeful her days at childcare won't be too long, but I do see that she is ready for more than just hanging out with mom. And if we are being honest, I am ready for more, too. I am soaking in every single little minute with this girl (okay, I do start to lose my mind when she wakes up every hour on the hour all night for eight straight hours :-). Jim is back to work as of yesterday and I am already mourning the loss of such a unique and wonderful time as just the three of us. I also know how lucky we are to have those memories and we will continue to build them in different ways. So, I am milk pumping machine in preparation for childcare and Lucy and I are going to make the most out of the last weeks before we make another transition.