Delightful, Remarkable...Chill

On our most recent trip to Red Rock Canyon in Las Vegas last spring we were touring through the lobbies of the Ballagio. We saw a couple with a young baby in a stroller and I commented that I didn't think it would be very enjoyable to have a baby on a trip to Sin City. Jim asked why not, afterall, "babies just chill." Even the three other guys we were with on the trip laughed in his face.

Guess what Lucy Lynn does? She chills. Guess how many times a day I have to hear that babies "just chill?" As many times as diapers I change in a day. Lucy is remarkable. Not only I am astonished by the fact that this perfect little human grew inside me, created from love, but she is absolutely delightful. She has two major dislikes that we can figure out. Wet diapers are not her thing and she does not like to be too hot or too cold. She gives has clear communication for all of her needs, though. She has a rumbly belly face, a wet diaper whimper, a hunger snarf and a content sigh. The three of us are learning about this new communication and every day we learn something new about one another. She is amazing. She is changing and growing and amazing us every minute of every day.

So far Lucy has been a busy girl. She has had a million firsts and I am amazed by her adaptability. Lucy has been, first of all, born into the world. She had her first car ride home with a very nervous and protective mommy. She has been out for sushi (which I have been craving and craving). Lucy Lou has ventured into Target (which put Mommy right over the edge) and she had a successful visit to the pediatrician. We have had a string of lucky warm(ish) days and have taken her for two stroller walks and two strapped-to-daddy in the front carrier walks. I even got up the courage to leave the house today for an hour and half without her (the longest her and I have been apart EVER) and she spent some nice time with daddy.

Some of Lucy's favorite things are sunbathing and coconut oil massages. When/if the sun comes in the back windows, I lay her on the bath sponge and rub her gently with coconut oil. She is definitely in reptilian molting phase after going from a wet to a dry environment. I am just surmising, but I would think all of the flaky skin must be a bit uncomfortable. Of course, her bodily functions do not cease simply because she is taking a naked sunbathe, so I have learned to be prepared for anything! She also loves to listen to her daddy bear read poetry to her, which is not surprising considering he did this for her in utero, as well. She likes to sit in her swing, but doesn't seem that interested in actually swinging and loves to suckle a pinky finger when she is having trouble to getting to eat. Of course, her all time favorite activity is nursing and she is a champion eater. We are enjoying watching her little thigh rolls fill in a little more every day.

Besides my bewilderment at this little girl, I have to say that I am dumbfounded by the biology of a womans body (specifically mine at this time, as the world seems small and centered around the three of us currently).  Not only did I grow a human INSIDE my uterus, but I grew a disposable organ to sustain her life. Then, I gave birth to her. And to top that off I continue to sustain her life with breast milk. Then there are all the hormones that make sure I feel connected to this little lady to ensure her safety and her ability to thrive. One of Jim's favorite things to say now is, "the prolactin is strong with this one." I had a time letting him push the stroller outside of our neighborhood today. And god help the poor sole who attempts to lift the flap on her car seat cover.

As a family we have gotten into a better night time routine. The first two night Jim and I were sure she was too hot...no too cold...not, definitely to warm! We were also terrified of SIDS and I couldn't get comfortable breast feeding. Thankfully our Doula, Kate, was here this past Monday and helped to calm us down. We did research on SIDS and realize that she is really not in danger of this in our current set-up. We have her sleeping in a fleece sleep sack and I keep a hat by the bed in case I feel cold. Clearly, if I am cold she is, too :-). Lucy and I are a lot more comfortable with each other while she is nursing and nursing in bed has become much easier. Kate recommended mixing sweet orange with coconut oil and rubbing that on gassy belly. This has worked for Lucy on a couple of different occasions. Have I mentioned how grateful we are for the opportunity to have had two doula's for this experience?

A few things that I have already learned if there is a next time:

• When buying maternity clothing, try to buy tops that can also act as nursing tops. 
• Hire a doula. Try to get Kate Dimfle or Erin Kerr. Priceless. 
• Be prepared to sore as your organs reorganize. 
• Don't be a freak about SIDS.
• Take the nursing pillow into the hospital. Don't leave it in the car the whole time you are there and make your back ache trying to get comfortable in a hospital bed with hospital pillows.
• Be easy on yourself. Hormones are wild. WILD.
• Labor and delivery are your and your partners experience. Make sure that you are clear about what you want before hand and stick to that. 
• Having a Moby Wrap and and an Ergo Carrier is beneficial. Both serve different baby wearing purposes. 
• Hire a doula. 
• Figure out low-light camera settings before labor and delivery. 
• Take video of the first 10-30 minutes that baby is on mom/dad's chest. 
• Waiting to work out again is difficult, especially when your body feels ready. You will get there. Be patient and enjoy every second with the sweet little one that your body made and now needs to recover from. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

OVERDUE! But not really....

 For memories sake, here is a timeline of the past week or so (that I am adding to throughout the day today, December 17).

1. Smidgey is definitely headed south. There is much less pressure on my ribs. Still feeling great.
2. Mucus plug came out on the night of Sunday evening, December 14.
3. We received a call that our doula has had a death in the family. This means we now have the back-up doula, Kate. We had interviewed her originally and had a VERY difficult time deciding who to go with. They are two amazing women. We met with Kate yesterday, December 16, and are feeling great about having her with us for this part of the adventure. 
4. I may be leaking "waters" as of Wednesday morning, December 17.
5. 1:30 p.m. midwife appointment today for a non-stress test to monitor's the baby's heart rate and check the blood flow to the placenta and the level of amniotic fluid.
6. 11:00 a.m.: Just called Jim to tell him that I am feeling infrequent, but consistent low cramping. He is planning to come home at lunch at see how things are going. I am feeling really calm and happy. I am grateful to be at home in a comfortable, calm environment. 

(POST SCRIPT: What I didn't know while I was typing this was that I was in early labor. The low cramping was most definitely contractions. The next post will describe what followed after this post. It will probably take me some time to get it all down. On to the next adventure!)

A rant about induction, women's rights and waivers:

I would like to say the OBGYN Associates of Ithaca have a hang up about 41 weeks of pregnancy. Unfortunately it seems like this entire country has this road block. From my research, stories of other moms and our doula I have learned that most first time moms go over their due date. Keep in mind that the due date is ESTIMATED. In fact, at our 20 week ultrasound the midwife said that it seemed like Smidgey was probably 7 days younger than originally ESTIMATED. They did not move the due date, which at the time was a comfort to me. I was not interested in having a week of progress "taken away." If only I had know what a difference a week would make. 

Now Jim and I are being asked to sign a waiver that says we understand the increased risks of going past 41 weeks without an induction. See form below for risks. Yes, if put increased risk of stillbirth on a piece of paper and put it in front of a new mom, I can completely understand why she would say, "Induce me now!!!!" Note that this waiver does not actually give evidence to support these risks making it difficult to feel that we can make an informed decision. We have decided to sign the waiver (which doesn't seem like it would ever hold up in court) and speak with the midwife about reviewing the 20 ultrasound data to consider moving our due date. We have a 1:30 appointment today so they can complete a non-stress test. 

What I think we should be giving a waiver for is the increased risks with an induction. Although this pregnancy has been maybe the most wonderful experience of my life, I have felt surprised all along at the amount of things that are simply done to me/us. There is very little conversation and I surmise that there would be even less if we were seeing OB's and not midwives or if we lived in a place that was just a hippie village wearing the disguise of a university town. The entire system is broken and this is coming from a woman who has had an overall positive experience and is looking forward to labor and delivery. The science of babies is inexact. I get that. I don't even mind the more close monitoring of the baby as we go past the ESTIMATED 40 week mark. What I do not like is that lack of information and resources that has been provided to us. I can see why 1/3 births in this country are by Cesarean Section. Anxious doctors, old habits and synthetic chemicals that increase stress in a mama who is working to remain calm, release oxytocin and soak up every last ounce of this beautiful process. 

Cozy & Content

Gram brought us some of my baby clothing.
It was so special to go through it with her.

Although our due date has come and gone, the three of us are all cozy and content. We got a pretty good snow over the past two days and it has been the perfect time to relax and enjoy every last moment I have of being pregnant. Pretty soon little Smidgey will be here with us and I will miss feeling her from inside. Jim and I are both looking forward to meeting her, though, and finding out who this little girl is.

40 Weeks...will this be the last?

Smidgey let Daddy Bear keep his birthday.

She still seems to be sitting pretty high, although she is definitely on a downward journey at this point. This week's doctor's appointment showed all signs of a healthy mom and baby. Smidgey's heart sounds strong and I am feeling great. This week has included lots of swimming, squatting, lifting and walking with a nice long massage somewhere in the middle. The chiropractic care I have been receiving throughout my entire pregnancy has also been crucial. Everyone has a different experience, but I highly recommend activity, massage and chiropractics for pregnancy. I think the combination of those with an amazingly supportive husband and family have made this past 10 months some of the best I can every remember. I can only imagine what how splendid life will be when we are really a family of three.

This past week has given me a lot of time to get the rest of my job transitioned to the interim employee who will be/has taken over for me. She has been wonderful and the extra time has allowed the two of us to get many hours of training completed. This has all helped in keeping me calm, cool and collected. Although I spent most of the day on Tuesday in the office, I think I will work from home until she arrives. At this point I can be on paid leave with PTO until March 18. The longer she cooks, the further out I can push that leave time.

My sister, who has a super busy life, sent us a box of goodies, many items that were familiar to me that I had once sent to my nieces. She even found a "classic" toy that I had when I was little. It was really fun to go through each item with her on Facetime. We are so lucky to have that technology available to us to help decrease the miles in between our families.

B is for Baby Bisha Belly

30 is going to be a great year. Many special people in my life made my birthday a great day and those same people are already a part of Smidgey's village. This is the first year I can remember that I did not announce my birthday month and countdown every day. This less than 6 pound little bitty girl has already started taking over my life in the best way possible. I will always remember my 30th birthday with Smidge in my belly.

The Hoskers and my parents joined forces to get me the one thing I have been wanting to do for months. On Sunday morning with blue skies, the most wonderful photographer came to our house to do a maternity photo shoot. I had really been wanting to do this and really not wanting to spend an arm and a leg on it. The icing on the cake was having Gram with us for the shoot and we were able to get some shots with the rocker she reupholstered.  Here is a sneak preview of the photos.

                                        

 

The mom update: I am hot, hot, hot. For the first time in almost 6 years, we had to take the down comforter off of our bed, turn the heat down to 66 degress and turn the fan on in order to sleep. We spent yesterday afternoon climbing at the Syracuse rock gym. I got 20 laps in (up and down), which is puny in comparison to a normal climbing day, but it still felt amazing. As of last week I was up 14 pounds total since my first prenatal appointment, but I am pretty sure she/we is/are up another pound this week! I am still sleeping pretty well, but am looking forward to sleeping on my back again. My hospital bag is mostly packed and I am taking the carseat to the fire station this week to learn the proper installation process. Jim told Smidge she was free to come any time after my birthday and which tells me he is ready to go. Now it is just a waiting game. While we are both looking forward to meeting her, she can stay inside as long as she needs. The closer to the due date she gets arrive, the more time she has to grow without doing any work. Once she is here, she will have some responsibilities for growth and body temperature regulation.

Tiny Dresses

36 Weeks

We had our 36 week (9month!) appointment this week. Smidgey Roo is head down, face down and making her mommy and daddy bear feel calm and comfortable with her progress. Her heartbeat kept darting up into the 160's as she squirmed and played. It is fascinating to listen to heart range while she goes from calm and collected to wound up and wiggly, which she tends to do while we are at the doctor's office. Show off.

We are now less than four weeks from the ESTIMATED due date. All of my worries about a premie baby have subsided and the one's I had been so strongly experiencing seem futile. What do you know? Worrying about something I had almost no control over was worthless! The midwife thinks she is going to be a tiny baby even if she sticks around in there for another four or five weeks. My body thinks this is just fine.

Gram came up for a visit and to volunteer with us at Smidgey's first Family Reading Partnership Kids Book Fest this past weekend. She spoiled the pants off of us, like usual, and got Baby Bisha her first two books autographed by an author. This is something I have been doing for my nieces for many years, but hadn't even considered for our own kid. It was so special to have her spend time reading those books to the baby, too. Gram even bought Smidge a brand new little, bitty, teeny, tiny Christmas dress. It is totally impractical and will be up around her little armpits, but it is going to make stinkin' cute Christmas pictures in front of the Christmas tree. She will only be a brand new Christmas baby one time and daddy will just have to start coping with dresses and bows some time soon.

I am still feeling great and enjoying this process. When Smidgey wakes up at 3:00 a.m. with hiccups I remind myself that soon enough I won't feel her from the inside and I lay awake to enjoy her growth and development. Climbing has officially ended for me, mostly due to the compression of the harness on my belly and the fact that I can no longer see my toes :-). Swimming continues to be an important part of movement, as well walking, rowing and lifting weights. Motion is lotion. Sitting, I have found, is the worst possible thing I can to my body. My 8-5 desk job is quickly getting old. I rotate from a chair to a yoga ball to standing with frequent loops around the building, but it is still an all day office job. 

As a quick side note, the Affordable Care Act allowed us to get my top choice breast pump at a very low expense to us. Although we have private health insurance, this act mandates that insurance companies put $178.50 toward a breast pump to own (not rent). The total cost of this top of the line pump was only $210.00 so we are thrilled at this support from the government! 

Nesting Mummy

Mummy and Mummy's Little Helper

35 Weeks...5 more until our due date!

 Who can resist using the bump to build a costume? As a last minute decision we decided not be old, married and expecting and went out for Halloween. Without painting my belly as a pumpkin, I wanted to advantage of a possible one time opportunity to use the 8 and half month belly to build a costume. Here is the outcome...Mummy and Mummy's Little Helper.

26 Homemade Burp Cloths 

Rumor has it that the nesting will gain in momentum as the time to meet this little lady gets closer. It is hard to imagine that! I mad 26 burp cloths out of scrap material last week. I had no idea burp cloths were at the steep price of 3 for $12! I finished up the birth announcement cross stitch I have been working on. After Smidge is born, Gram will stitch in the birth details, including birth date, name, weight and length/height. The silverware drawer is clean and so are the faces of the kitchen cabinets. We rearranged the living room and bought a new area rug. The junk drawer in the kitchen now has organizers in it and looks awesome. I organized my clothing and packed away summer time maternity wear. This is all just in the past week! I am not sure what I will do when there is nothing left. I suppose I can re-re-reorganize one of our closets :-).

Fundas with our Doula

34 Weeks

Yesterday was our first official visit would our doula, Erin Kerr, since we decided to hire her a few weeks ago. We "interviewed" two different doulas in town and decided to go with Erin for her subtle mix of crunchy-Ithacan spirit and her type A organization. She spent three hours at our house with us last night. Erin is overflowing with knowledge and we soaked it all in. There is an enormous comfort in knowing that she will be with us during labor & delivery. She will help us remember conversations we had and decisions we made while we weren't in the middle of labor, though her role is to speak with us about those conversations in a timely manner and support us in speaking to the providers at the hospital. We spent quite a bit of time talking about preparing to go to the hospital and the interventions both during labor & delivery and postpartum.

Two of our main questions lingering from the birthing class we took at the hospital were about the Vitamin K injection and the Erythromycin ointment for baby's eyes. She pointed us in the direction of the two articles linked previously and gave us some facts about the history and current practice of each. At this point, we have decided to forgo the Erythromycin and accept the Vitamin K injection, both for a number of reasons.

We also learned that if a mom has pitocin during labor & delivery, she is given a continued drip of it after the delivery is over. Pitocin takes over the oxytocin's job in the body and the uterus will not contract without the continued intervention. There seem to be many medical interventions that providers just do to the mom and baby as part of a routine as opposed to explaining why they are medically necessary. In case of emergency, I get it. No questions. No stopping. Get mom and baby safe and on the other side of the emergency. In the case of concern with no explanation, panic and anxiety can be created. Lucky for us, we will have Erin there to help us decipher each situation.

There are so many amazing medical advancements and interventions available to women in our country. While I am appreciative of them from a scientific and medical perspective, I am hoping to avoid most, if not all, of them. Of course, I reserve the right to change my mind as many times as I like. I have never given birth before and can only have researched knowledge at this point, not experiential knowledge.  

I also got the feeling Daddy Bear is getting a better sense for the level of neediness causing exhaustion that an infant brings with her. We both know that the baby will eat every 2-3 hours. Learning that the baby will likely poop every time she eats (most breastfed babies do) and that the next 2-3 (45 min-3 hour) window begins at the start of the current feeding was a bit surprising to Jim. His eyes got as big as they did when the doula described my organs floating back down into place after place. He started calculated in his head and seemed to realize for the first time just how tired the Bisha's are going to be for a while. Add to that that this routine lasts for 3-6 months and he just about fell off of the couch. We talked this morning and both agreed to try not to take things personally when we are inevitably mean to each other at some point during those days of exhaustion. (I say this with a chuckle.)

3 hours worth of baby conversation had us both worn out and with lots to process and consider. Jim requested a coffee date with Erin around 37 or 38 weeks to make sure we are on the same page and to cover and last minute concerns and questions. Erin was lovely enough to oblige his request. I am sure we will do tons of thinking before then, but hopefully we can keep it shorter than 3 hours :-).

Worry Warts

32 Weeks Pregnant

We have arrived at 33 weeks pregnant, which means a little over 8 months along. I may have said it before, but Jim and I both agree that this is the slowest-fastest time we have ever experienced. At this time last year we were working through the details of our trip to Thailand and Singapore and settling in on the decision to go off of birth control at the end of that adventure. Now here we are...enjoying every little moment of growing a human life.

Smidgey's movements have definitely changed over the course of the past few months. She has gone from a flutterby to strong and consistent kicks/punches to more of a squirmy worm creating waves all across my belly. Lucky for me, she has managed to find the bottom of my rib cage this week, sometimes stopping me mid-sentence with a good wallop. I have become addicted to her movements and am amazed by the womanly art of pregnancy every time she hiccups.

Movement for me is become a bit more difficult, although still the most important part of feeling good and keeping my energy up (in addition to well-timed, diverse food). Swimming has even slowed recently and I have added on about 5 minutes to my mile time, which sometimes involves a few laps of walking now. However, I am still in that pool for 70 lengths! Personal training continues to be very important and has made a major impact on my balance and stamina. Squats seem to be the number one most recommended movement to prepare for child birth and squat I do! I am down to a little less than half my pre-pregnancy weight on the rack, but I am grateful to still be at it. Walking is also crucial at this point, which makes an 8-5 office job really interesting. I swear sitting at my desk is the most damaging part of this process.

(I made Jim take this video to remind that I can still a lot of things, just in a different and much more controlled way). 

Jim and I even had the opportunity to enjoy a gorgeous fall day in the Adirondack Mountains climbing two weekends ago. Jim climbed 7 routes and I climbed 2, but I wasn't even sure I would be able to tolerate my harness at 8 months pregnant. Being with my favorite climbing out in the woods on a sunny day surrounded by yellow, red and orange foliage was a welcome treat. It was a bonus to tie in to the rope and ascend 200 feet of rock.

Daddy had a chance to go to Moab, Utah over this past weekend to "try his hand" at a dream crack climbing destination. He managed to smash his phone the first day he and Yamin arrived to Indian Creek and then remained out of service range for the following 49.5 hours. Around hour 45 I started to realize that I am harboring major anxiety over having an early baby. At hour 49, I had just about convinced myself I was going to have to go through labor and delivery alone. At hour 49.5, I lost my mind when I heard Jim's voice. Message received: dig deep and uncover a way to cope with this unhealthy and unfounded fear. An amazing thing happened when I found out I was pregnant. I have a heightened sense of the importance of love and relationships and how easily those relationships can be altered or stripped away. This is something that will probably stick with me forever and has definitely grown in capacity over the course of this pregnancy, but I had a nice long talk with Smidgey about trusting her and trusting my body. Even if she does come early (or any number of other difficult situations that may arise and likely will at some point throughout this little girl's life) I cannot have so much anxiety waiting for the bottom to fall out. Luckily I am married to one amazing man and we are going to spend some intentional time together this weekend which always calms me right now.

Birth Class

31 Weeks and the weather is still warm!

We recently had the opportunity to take a birth class at Cayuga Medical Center, where I plan to give birth, at the beginning of October. I was perturbed by the mid-wife at Ithaca OBGYN that insisted they would only teach us how to be patients at the hospital and maintained that we take her class at the OBGYN office. We decided to take a class in the place that we would eventually end up in a few months. This was an excellent choice. We got to see the rooms, try out the different bed positions, practice driving in and parking (well, Jim did this part :-) and now we have general muscle memory about the process and the surroundings. I particularly appreciated the epidural demonstration that Nurse Jocelyn did for us. She explained that it can be shocking for a woman in labor to go from being a free bird to being connected to an  IV, the line for the epidural, a blood pressure monitor and a heart monitor for both mom and baby. Jim and I volunteered to do the demonstration and it was quite startling. I am in no way anti-medical intervention, but going from none to so much was jarring even in a practice round. It is good to have a more clear picture of what that looks like.

Overall the new wing at Cayuga Med is gorgeous. It may sound weird, but I am looking forward to labor and delivery. Never in my life have I felt more feminine or proud to be a woman and I haven't even given birth yet.

Healthy & Happy

30 Week Belly

Quick update from the 30 week appointment: Baby and I are both healthy and doing very well. We have confirmation that Smidgey is in fact a little girl. My belly is measuring between 29-30 centimeters, which is great for a 30 week baby. I am only up 9 pounds and have license (after a long lecture from the mid-wife) about increasing my calorie intake. This is partly due to my body swapping muscle for fat as my work out routine has changed over the course of the past 7 and a half months, I don't have to be told that twice! Smidgey's heart rate is between 120-130 (average range is 110-170) and she is still head down. Livelier than ever, Smidge gave the mid-wife another nice show at the appointment. My iron is good, my blood sugar is great and my overall health is holding strong. My gratefulness for such a wonderful experience so far is never-ending.

The "guest room" has been re-nested for about the 32nd time. Now we have the perfect spot for our new mobile and the book banner Gram made. I am still feeling really good lifting twice a week for 30 minutes with my trainer, Joey, and getting about 2-4 miles of lap swimming depending on the week. Not sleeping on my back is VERY difficult as I am still quite comfortable that way. The whole "blocking blood flow from the placenta" bit is pretty motivating, though. I think it is time for poor Jim to have an additional pillow added to the bed.

Jim is more amazing than ever. My sister got us a frame that says, "I never knew how much I loved your father until I had you." That sums up my feelings exactly. Hopefully he'll read this and decide to send me flowers, which I normally do not want, but the hormones wouldn't mind a small display of fresh buds on my desk.

Cake, Books, Family & Friends

This past week was overwhelmed Jim, Smidgey and me from start to finish. We experienced more love and support this week than I could possibly have anticipated. Auntie Crystal came to visit us from California. Aunt Tracy flew in from North Carolina. Meredith came up from Virginia. Friends and family gathered together to celebrate from all over New York. The weather was absolutely fantastic. Jim and I have never been so grateful for so many things.

Although I missed my four favorite little girls so very much, the time I got to spend with just my sister was wonderful. We went for pedicures, got a massage and even found the sign we have been looking for our entire lives. It was priceless time and I will cherish it forever.

My sister ditched me to finish getting our baby celebration together with my mom. Lucky for me, Meredith VanDeursen drove up from Virginia to join in the fun. Since the weather was so fabulous, we got to hike in Six Mile Creek Gorge and we stopped by Taughannock falls on the way back from our party. She even bought Smidgey the sweetest, most adorable Hokie gear I have ever seen. The first time I saw those little outfits my freshman year I knew I would have to have them some day. 

Finally the day of the Baby Celebration arrived on Saturday. We got a message to arrive at Barnes and Noble at noon to pick up a "clue." This was a very special book from Auntie Crystal, Poems to Learn by Heart, by Caroline Kennedy, with an invitation to the party that we have been looking forward to! Meredith snapped a quick photo and off we went to Cayuga Lake State Park in Seneca Falls, NY, a place so beautiful (and with stroller friendly walking trails right on the lake!) that we are planning to visit again soon. Auntie Crystal greeted us and showed us into a gorgeous wooden lodge where so many of our family and friends were gathered to celebrate with us.

The "theme" of the party was books and reading. There were books every where! It was so absolutely perfect and more than I could have ever imagined. Guests even brought books and placed a nameplate in their gift to Smidgey. Every time we read one of those books, this baby will know about one more amazing person in our family's life. My mom made a gorgeous cake that was the stump and a page out of Shel Silverstein's The Giving Tree as well as an 18 foot banner made out of children's picture books (which will likely be finding a place in Smidgerton's room). 

The generosity of everyone around was overwhelming. Anneke and her girls (and Tad?) handmade the most incredible mobile out of pieces of nature they found a their not-farmette. Aunt Tracy and Uncle Tyler supplied Smidge with the a "Thing 1" onesie that is so absolutely perfect for Jim's child with a matching bib and Dr. Suess book set that we will surely read four hundred times. Papa hand built a co-sleeper for our bedroom out of solid oak with all the love you could imagine. Gram is refurbishing my Great-Grandmothers gliding rocker with a uniquely embroidered B for Bisha on the cushion. Grandma and Grandpa B got Smidgey the sweetest little blue nighty with a matching hat and a handpainted elephant jumper. This list goes on and on! (Some day I will sit down and record everything!)

Jim and Tad showed off their Dad skills (or lack thereof?) with a silly game of dress the baby and get baby ready for a walk. They had everyone in stitches. The food was fantastic. The company was incredible. The venue was perfect. It was an amazing day. 

Oh, did I forget to mention the secret cake? And that we are having a baby girl? Jim wanted to know the sex of our baby more than I didn't, so my sister had a gluten free cake made for us with a blue or pink center. She took a sealed envelope from our mid-wife to the baker 8 weeks ago and the cake arrived with the surprise center. In the meantime, guests at the party were sticking the Giving Tree cake with toothpicks to get a sneak peak! Jokes on you. The secret cake came out only in the end. I was completely shocked at how much suspense the cake created...especially for me! Jim tried to get me to cut it, or at least help him, but I was as nervous as could be. He, of course, just loved all of the attention :-). The inside of the cake was speckled with pink and it looks like we are having a tiny little girl. There remains no need for princesses and animal print, although pink seems to have already made an entrance into the closet. 

Smidgey's First Flight and Golden Linings

Jeb gave Baby Smidge the cup that he used
when he was a baby, engraved with his name in
sterling silver and lined with gold.

On the weekend of September 18-21, Jim and I were lucky enough to sneak in one last pre-baby trip to Abingdon, Virginia. Not only did we get to climb the beautiful cliffs of Hidden Valley, but we had four days with friends who poured love over this baby the whole time. Jeb has been a very special person in our lives ever since he yelled at Jim, told him to get a job and buy a stick clip, a memory he doesn't seem to have :-). In addition to having spectacular company, we had lovely weather and even better climbing. While my abs have officially quit being a part of my rock climbing experience, I still top roped climbs from 5.7-5.9. My chiropractor here in Ithaca recommended that be my last rock climbing trip until after baby, but we'll see how I feel. Seeing my toes is becoming a bit of an issue :-).




As an unexpected bonus, Andria is temporarily living in Abingdon and we got to spend time with her. We now have lots of favored reading from her and Kire. It is such special time to get to be together with our wonderful Virginia friends who are family.  Though we are settling into New York more and more every day, there is something about those Virginia mountains that wrap around every where you look and always make me feel at home.

Doula's and Carseats

28 Weeks...7 months!!!

We had our 28 week/glucose appointment yesterday morning. Smidgerton has moved into a head down position, which is creating some very interesting pressure for the mama. Still lots of movement, I am just feeling it in different ways than I was before. Smidgey's heartbeat is going strong in the 130's and my belly is finally measuring 28 centimeters, which is the same as the number of weeks that I am pregnant. Last week was a particularly sleepy one and I knew that tiny baby was growing, growing, growing. Jim would say I was a bit grumpy, as he is a very brave man, but I like to think of it as extra tired. I have gained about 3 pounds since my last appointment 2 weeks ago. Let the rapid growth begin!

Jim and I decided we like the idea of having a doula at the birth and we had the opportunity to meet with Kate Dimfl yesterday evening. Not only was she absolutely personable and delightful, she is full of knowledge and experience. The idea, for us specifically, is that she would be the expert and the two of us would be partners and teammates. This relieves any unreasonable expectations I may conjure up in my hormonal head that Jim should be the expert and meet all of my needs during labor and delivery. We still plan to give birth at Cayuga Medical Center, but with a doula, hopefully Kate, at our side. Now, how can we get insurance to cover the cost?

Grandma and Grandpa Bisha came for a quick visit last night. (Jim is now the proud owner of his dad's motorcycle.) As a bonus, they brought down the stroller and carseat that they bought for their first grandbaby, which is a completely generous and lovely gift that we are grateful for. Things just keep getting more and more real. I have to say, seeing your husband's left brain navigate a stroller and carseat is pretty darn sweet. Some days I think I fall even more in love with that man. I was shocked he didn't just ignore the box or pretend like we really don't need them. To my surprise, he got it all set-up, analyzed the packaging it came in and pushed it around the house. Then he shoved it in a corner and it appears the ignoring has begun. 

Little Notes to Remember

26 weeks along and into the third and final trimester!

Smidgster and I had a check-up yesterday. Little thing is apparently a show-off, which is a good reminder that this baby is definitely a product of Jim Bisha. As soon as the midwife put the heart monitor on my belly, Smidge started kicking and punching like crazy making the monitor bob up and down! Though this is no indication of anything whatsoever, it was fun for the mama.

As a side note, the visit went well again. This was my first visit without Jim which was absolutely fine. Baby's heart is beating between 135-140 and growth looks normal, though I am measuring at about a week behind schedule (which is fine). I learned that Tinactin is a level C pregnancy drug and that it shouldn't be used. So much to learn! I was also reminded that my favorite sound in the world is the wooshing of that teeny, tiny strong little heartbeat. What a joy.

Smidgey the Adventurer

Navigating pregnancy, a changing body, activities that I love and activities that Jim and I love together has been quite the maneuver. First, there are very few references for said activities. Jim and I have read every rock climbing while pregnant blog we could find, which is great for learning from the experience of others, but not so great from a medical perspective. Turns out most of the doctors/midwives I am exposed to do not have an experience in this area, so their advice and personal suggestions feels a bit haphazard.

What we decided in the end, at least for climbing, is that I/we would use that knowledge gained and feelings and go from there. We traveled to Rumney, NH over July 4th weekend. At that time (about 15 weeks pregnant) I was able to climb in the low 5.10 range and really enjoy myself. Of course, there was no belly in the way yet and I was on a "I don't feel like vomiting" high. As we packed to go a Labor Day trip back up to Rumney, Jim came clean and told me he felt concerned. He knew that my expectations would be similar to the last time we were there and that, at almost 26 weeks pregnant and a few days from the third trimester, that these expectations would lead to unnecessary disappointment and frustration.

This was a hard pill to swallow, even more difficult than the huge prenatal pill I take religiously, but I was grateful that Jim felt comfortable communicating clearly and respectfully with me. I agreed to change to my expectations and felt that hiking into the rock with my pack on (minus water, which Jim agreed to carry), setting up a hammock and climbing one route a day at 5.8 or below would still make a wonderful weekend with my husband and friends.

Jim wasn't wrong ;-). Though I climbed more than a route a day, I couldn't even begin to touch the routes that were overhanging 5.9 and above. Tried I did, but decided to come back down to the ground, and reality, after ten minutes of hanging from the rope in a very uncomfortable harness. Regardless, we did have a great weekend. I never had to set-up the hammock. I continue to be a trustworthy belayer (though a belayer with limits) and a rock climber. Rock climbing, adventuring and being outside is where Jim and I find our zen, if you will. Without that time, at least in some capacity, and without his patience and grace in supporting my changing needs, things could get pretty resentful around our house. I am grateful for another lovely weekend at the crag, for friends who humor me and feel my belly when I say so and for a husband who is supportive no matter what limitations, even if temporary, I put on our experience.

Over the past few months I have learned that backing off and being in the moment makes life much more enjoyable. I think I am always learning about this, but pregnancy has amplified the process. Temporary body changes that end in a baby is a very different situation for an active person than so many others that people are experiencing every day.

On a different, back to the cooing and sweet stuff, when we got home from Rumney, the below item was waiting on the porch from two of our most darling friends, Erin and Yamin. While I will not admit how long it took Daddy Bear to get it all set-up as he refused directions or help from his lovely wife, it makes me smile every time I go in the guest room.