Worry Warts

32 Weeks Pregnant

We have arrived at 33 weeks pregnant, which means a little over 8 months along. I may have said it before, but Jim and I both agree that this is the slowest-fastest time we have ever experienced. At this time last year we were working through the details of our trip to Thailand and Singapore and settling in on the decision to go off of birth control at the end of that adventure. Now here we are...enjoying every little moment of growing a human life.

Smidgey's movements have definitely changed over the course of the past few months. She has gone from a flutterby to strong and consistent kicks/punches to more of a squirmy worm creating waves all across my belly. Lucky for me, she has managed to find the bottom of my rib cage this week, sometimes stopping me mid-sentence with a good wallop. I have become addicted to her movements and am amazed by the womanly art of pregnancy every time she hiccups.

Movement for me is become a bit more difficult, although still the most important part of feeling good and keeping my energy up (in addition to well-timed, diverse food). Swimming has even slowed recently and I have added on about 5 minutes to my mile time, which sometimes involves a few laps of walking now. However, I am still in that pool for 70 lengths! Personal training continues to be very important and has made a major impact on my balance and stamina. Squats seem to be the number one most recommended movement to prepare for child birth and squat I do! I am down to a little less than half my pre-pregnancy weight on the rack, but I am grateful to still be at it. Walking is also crucial at this point, which makes an 8-5 office job really interesting. I swear sitting at my desk is the most damaging part of this process.

(I made Jim take this video to remind that I can still a lot of things, just in a different and much more controlled way). 

Jim and I even had the opportunity to enjoy a gorgeous fall day in the Adirondack Mountains climbing two weekends ago. Jim climbed 7 routes and I climbed 2, but I wasn't even sure I would be able to tolerate my harness at 8 months pregnant. Being with my favorite climbing out in the woods on a sunny day surrounded by yellow, red and orange foliage was a welcome treat. It was a bonus to tie in to the rope and ascend 200 feet of rock.

Daddy had a chance to go to Moab, Utah over this past weekend to "try his hand" at a dream crack climbing destination. He managed to smash his phone the first day he and Yamin arrived to Indian Creek and then remained out of service range for the following 49.5 hours. Around hour 45 I started to realize that I am harboring major anxiety over having an early baby. At hour 49, I had just about convinced myself I was going to have to go through labor and delivery alone. At hour 49.5, I lost my mind when I heard Jim's voice. Message received: dig deep and uncover a way to cope with this unhealthy and unfounded fear. An amazing thing happened when I found out I was pregnant. I have a heightened sense of the importance of love and relationships and how easily those relationships can be altered or stripped away. This is something that will probably stick with me forever and has definitely grown in capacity over the course of this pregnancy, but I had a nice long talk with Smidgey about trusting her and trusting my body. Even if she does come early (or any number of other difficult situations that may arise and likely will at some point throughout this little girl's life) I cannot have so much anxiety waiting for the bottom to fall out. Luckily I am married to one amazing man and we are going to spend some intentional time together this weekend which always calms me right now.