Lucy (and Mommy) Go To School

B-Dids beside her first ever cubby on her first day of school.

Lucy, Jim and I have not only survived my first three weeks in the Joint Doctoral Program at San Francisco State University and UC Berkeley, but I would confidently say we are all doing very well. We spent a full week adapting to LuLaBee’s new classroom and teachers with at least one us of there with her and it seems to have paid off in spades. Although I will probably always like we left Ithaca without much closure, the decision to get here and get settled before my program started also seems to have made an enormous difference.

In her third week at school, we are getting in a smooth groove and, at the request of her teachers, are getting a pretty consistent routine down. Some days she wakes up early for a morning poo and then naps at home before school, making for a later start, but most days my schedule is flexible enough that I can keep her home for a good rest. She has her first ever little cold, mostly a stuffy nose, and I have been pretty focused on getting her rested up and healthy. Lucy seems to really enjoy going to school and has a positive reaction when we arrive in the mornings, some days squirming out my arms to give her teachers lovies or to get busy playing.

Lucy is tied with another little guy for oldest in the class, but is by far the most mobile and confident. It cracks me up to see a line of little babes following behind her, trying to climb up and down the stairs like she is now doing with ease and confidence. Her teachers, Rizwanna and Janaciara (who are saints…7 infants in one room!!), call her their “7^th Heaven.” Last week while every baby in the room was melting down except for Lucy, she crawled across the room, into the book section and sat and flipped through books on her own until everyone got themselves together. What a darling girl. The fact that she enjoys absolutely melts my heart. Today she cleared some pillows, a teacher and a baby out of her way to crawl over to the ball container, stand up on it, and pull out balls one at a time. She is even shuffling one or two steps left to right while she is standing now. No encouragement is being providing from us in terms of walking, but she seems motivated to be upright and mobile. This evening we took her to a park near our apartment and she climbed up all 11 stairs on the toddle playground three time in a row! Jim and I could hardly believe it.

We usually arrive a bit before I have to take off for class and it is delightful to have time to play with her and watch her in her own little world, built just for humans her size. My supply is doing well and I am grateful for the 8 months of time that we had together with nothing but story time, snuggles and naps on our agenda. My body seems to be producing as much milk as it was before she started eating sold foods, which can be annoying when I don’t actually need to pump, but mostly I am just thankful that this potential stressor has been reduced. There is something in my mind about 10 months that feels good about breastfeeding. It seems like it should be smooth sailing until then. The pumping stations on both campuses are adequate and I am really only having to pump once in the morning at home and (usually) on a day in between classes. While I think I will be sad when the nursies are over, I won’t be sorry I am not carrying my pump around with me everywhere I go!

How to get work done with a sleeping babe
strapped to your chest. Snuggles and studies.

It also feels great to engage in conversations about topics that seemed like they only existed in another life three weeks ago. Each day I am less distracted by how much I miss my girl when I see her so happy at school. I absolutely hate waiting to see her on my way to pick her up each day, but even the commute to and from SFSU is getting easier. Jim, “Daga,” picks her up from school on Wednesday and this is important time for them, too. When I was a kid it was always special when dad showed up and always expected when mom was there. I hope Lucy sees the presence of us both as normal, everyday stuff. Class is actually interesting and my course load is not nearly as brutal as I was anticipating. The fabulous part about the intellectual community of UC Berkeley is that learning is self-motivated. If you want to take more class, you can. You can even take classes at Stanford, but if you want to see your daughter more than you want a 4.0, everyone thinks that is great, too. My emotions have been a bit of a roller coaster, especially since LuBug got her first cold, but we are going to do this. And it is going to be great.

Part of our success has been my micro-management of our household organization. We are prepping meals (breakfast, lunch and dinner) on Sundays to the fullest extent possible. This leaves evening time for family time and I am working hard on being present in the moment as soon as I leave campus and pick up my girl. One of things I miss most from the past eight, foot-loose and fancy-free months is living in the moment. Now I am feeling like I am always preparing for the next step. I think this will relax over time, but right now it is working exceptionally well so we are going to keep it up. Jim has been helpful supportive around the house, with our sweet little babe and with my never ending ups and downs about whether or not we are ruining our daughter’s life J. He may leave black socks all over creation, but he is a rock and I wouldn’t want to do this without him. In fact, I don’t think I would do this without him.